Please Don’t Send Harry and Meghan Back to Britain | Opinion
Newsweek · C · trust 36/100
0 Share Newsweek is a Trust Project member See more of our trusted coverage when you search. Prefer Newsweek on Google to see more of our trusted coverage when you search. Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's planned return to the United Kingdom after six years spent hawking good vibes and overpriced jam in California is the least welcome comeback since Napoleon Bonaparte escaped from Elba.
It’s always slightly awkward discussing the pros and cons of the Sussex bandwagon’s next stop from inside the media, since the media will be the biggest beneficiaries of their latest announcement: that the couple is moving in September to enroll their children, Prince Archie and Princess Lilibet, in a British school.
For the British media, in particular, the prospect of a relentless PR war between the Sussexes and their nemeses, Mr. and Mrs. Reliable (aka Prince William and Princess Kate), is practically orgasmic. The regrettable but undeniable truth is that Harry and Meghan are clickbait in human form.
I can only speak for myself, though I suspect I speak for many more, when I say please don’t let this happen. Not having them around was great because we only had to think of them occasionally, such as when Harry lost his legal battle over privacy against the Daily Mail so spectacularly this summer, or when Meghan gets through yet another press officer. They were America’s problem, and that’s how most Brits liked it.
But now all that will change and we’ll all be made to suffer (all except those who monitor online traffic) because it means day after day of speculation, press releases, friends briefing off the record, disgruntled former aides and cryptic social media posts.
The return of the Duke and Duchess to the U.K. will pitch Meghan against our beloved future queen Kate, who in Meghan’s absence has been elevated by the right-wing press to a cross between domestic goddess and secular saint. And the narrative will extend to the mother of all brother bust-ups. It’s balding man with a beard versus balding man with a beard (Not that I can talk).
British people are many things: inward-looking, unserious, maybe a little paranoid. But one of their more creditable qualities is that they are averse to whining and moaning, especially when it comes from extreme privilege. Harry and Meghan were, I recall, really quite loved when they got married. Harry also carried the undoubted kudos of having served his country in Afghanistan and sympathy after the death of his mother, Princess Diana. I think it’s also fair to say they also had some cause to dislike the chilliness of royal life and the aggression of the media.
But you can’t claim those grievances with any credibility if you then spend the next six years rinsing the identity and lifestyle you say you hate for money. Brits find it very odd—and they come to their own conclusions about this—that Meghan demands privacy while insisting on being called a “duchess” and appearing to trade on her title. South Park 's 2023 “Worldwide Privacy Tour” episode was greeted with glee by a nation sick to death of the hypocrisy.
Related Story Meghan Markle’s UK Popularity Hits New Low in Polling Reading reports about the status of Harry and Meghan’s Netflix deal, or the audience figures for Meghan’s podcast, or the sales of her artisanal honey was somehow manageable because you knew it was all taking place more than 5,000 miles away . At least at Thanksgiving you know your annoying relatives are only going to stay for a day or two.
I’m already suffering from nervous Meghaustion just thinking about how bad this is going to get. The atmosphere when they arrive, to borrow a favorite word of the British media, will be “febrile." Sane people don’t have the headspace for this nonsense.
Harry and Meghan hopping from Britain to the U.S. and back again reminds me of King Lear and his 100 knights bothering his children. Like them, he created this mess.
One thing I’ve found while bumping into friendly Americans on holiday over the years is how many assume the king (or queen back in the day) is actually in charge of the country. This is one of those times when I wish he was. Then, Charles could just wave his hand or sign a decree and put the two back on the plane.
George Chesterton is Newsweek’s Director, Publishing & Subscriptions Strategy.
The views expressed in this article are the writer's own.
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